Open Championship: Day 1

Tee Time

It is Open Championship Week mother fuckers. And the Open is back at St. Andrews. Get excited! Day 1 is already in the books. No, the actual tourney didn’t start on Monday, but the players have all made their sojourn to Scotland and the home of golf. The R&A made their ‘games’ and announced them for the public to see. They are as follows, and there are some gems. (All times Eastern, my comments in bold)


1:32 a.m.-6:33 a.m. – Thomas Bjorn, Denmark; Greg Owen, England; Rod Pampling, Australia.

1:43 a.m.-6:44 a.m. – Todd Hamilton, United States; a-Paul Dunne, Ireland; James Hahn, United States.

Why don’t they just put Hamilton, Paul Lawrie, and Ben Curtis in the same group and make them fight to the death? 

1:54 a.m.-6:55 a.m. – Graham DeLaet, Canada; Brian Harman, United States; Russell Knox, Scotland.

2:05 a.m.-7:06 a.m. – Matt Every, United States; Alexander Levy, France; David Lingmerth, Sweden.

2:16 a.m.-7:17 a.m. – Joost Luiten, Netherlands; Matt Jones, Australia; Robert Streb, United States.

2:27 a.m.-7:28 a.m. – Anthony Wall, England; Byeong-Hun An, South Korea; a-Jordan Niebrugge, United States.

2:38 a.m.-7:39 a.m. – Sandy Lyle, Scotland; Charley Hoffman, United States; Kevin Na, United States.

2:49 a.m.-7:50 a.m. – Retief Goosen, South Africa; Shane Lowry, Ireland; Kevin Streelman, United States.

3 a.m.-8:01 a.m. – Carl Pettersson, Sweden; Luke Donald, England; Hunter Mahan, United States.

3:11 a.m.-8:12 a.m. – Ross Fisher, England; Victor Dubuisson, France; Billy Horschel, United States.

3:22 a.m.-8:23 a.m. – Graeme McDowell, Northern Ireland; Webb Simpson, United States; a-Oliver Schniederjans, United States.

I bet Ollie beats both former U.S. Open champs in for their two rounds together. 

3:33 a.m.-8:34 a.m. – Ernie Els, South Africa; Tom Watson, United States; Brandt Snedeker, United States.

3:44 a.m.-8:45 a.m. – J.B. Holmes, United States; Brendon Todd, United States; Shinji Tomimura, Japan.

4 a.m.-9:01 a.m. – Ian Poulter, England; Charl Schwartzel, South Africa; Bubba Watson, United States.

Ha ha ha…..poor Charl, who did he piss off at the R & A?

4:11 a.m.-9:12 a.m. – Sergio Garcia, Spain; Lee Westwood, England; Patrick Reed, United States.

Garcia and Reed in the same group, at the Britsh……there will be blood. 

4:22 a.m.-9:23 a.m. – Darren Clarke, Northern Ireland; Matteo Manassero, Italy; a-Romain Langasque, France.

4:33 a.m.-9:34 a.m. – Dustin Johnson, United States; Hideki Matsuyama, Japan; Jordan Spieth, United States.

Johnson says he’s over his U.S. Open choke. He also says Jordan’s path to the Grand Slam won’t be a cake walk because he’s in both fields. Put up or shut up time, DJ. 

4:44 a.m.-9:45 a.m. – Paul Lawrie, Scotland; Ryan Palmer, United States; Kevin Kisner, United States.

4:55 a.m.-9:56 a.m. – Tiger Woods, United States; Louis Oosthuizen, South Africa; Jason Day, Australia.

Tiger seems to play with either Jason or Louis every time he tees it up. This cannot be random. I’ll also go out on a limb and say Tiger top 10s this week. 

5:06 a.m.-10:07 a.m. – John Senden, Australia; Tadahiro Takayama, Japan; Brooks Koepka, United States.

5:17 a.m.-10:18 a.m. – David Duval, United States; Stewart Cink, United States; Ben Curtis, United States.

Oh, here’s the former champ group in which all three players suck now. 

5:28 a.m.-10:29 a.m. – Mikko Ilonen, Finland; David Howell, England; Greg Chalmers, Australia.

5:39 a.m.-10:40 a.m. – Raphael Jacquelin, France; David Hearn, Canada; Eddie Pepperell, England.

5:50 a.m.-10:51 a.m. – Tyrrell Hatton, England; Scott Arnold, Australia; a-Paul Kinnear, England.

6:01 a.m.-11:02 a.m. – Adam Bland, Australia; Gary Boyd, England; Daniel Brooks, England.

6:12 a.m.-11:13 a.m. – Scott Hend, Australia; Jonathan Moore, United States; Ryan Fox, New Zealand.

Check their IDs, I couldn’t find any of these cats in a crowd with a gun to my head.

6:23 a.m.-1:32 a.m. – Mark Calcavecchia, United States; Marcel Siem, Germany; Jaco Van Zyl, South Africa.

6:44 a.m.-1:43 a.m. – Thomas Aiken, South Africa; David Lipsky, United States; Jonas Blixt, Sweden.

6:55 a.m.-1:54 a.m. – Soren Kjeldsen, Denmark; Morgan Hoffmann, United States; Danny Lee, New Zealand.

7:06 a.m.-2:05 a.m. – Richie Ramsay, Scotland; Pablo Larrazabal, Spain; Cameron Tringale, United States.

7:17 a.m.-2:16 a.m. – Steven Bowditch, Australia; Hiroshi Iwata, Japan; Ben Martin, United States.

7:28 a.m.-2:27 a.m. – George Coetzee, South Africa; Anirban Lahiri, India; Rafael Cabrera-Bello, Spain.

7:39 a.m.-2:38 a.m. – Padraig Harrington, Ireland; Liang Wen-chong, China; Marc Warren, Scotland.

7:50 a.m.-2:49 a.m.- John Daly, United States; Miguel Angel Jimenez, Spain; Jason Dufner, United States.

This one could be Peter Dawson’s wet dream. My god. Will Keegan send Duf to do his dirty work and finish off Miguel? Will Daly and the Mechanic have a cock swinging contest while waiting on a tee? Cigars, cigarettes, and Skoal…oh my. 

8:01 a.m.-3 a.m. – Zach Johnson, United States; Bernd Wiesberger, Austria; Tommy Fleetwood, England.

Fleetwood is everybody’s dark horse right now. 

8:12 a.m.-3:11 a.m. – Thongchai Jaidee, Thailand; Danny Willett, England; Gary Woodland, United States.

8:23 a.m.-3:22 a.m. – Geoff Ogilvy, Australia; Francesco Molinari, Italy; Bill Haas, United States.

8:34 a.m.-3:33 a.m. – Mark O’Meara, United States; Russell Henley, United States; a-Gunn Yang.

8:45 a.m.-3:44 a.m. – Bernhard Langer, Germany; Tom Lehman, United States; Justin Leonard, United States.

9:01 a.m.-4 a.m. – Stephen Gallacher, Scotlnad; Hiroyuki Fujita, Japan; Ryan Moore, United States.

9:12 a.m.-4:11 a.m. – Adam Scott, Australia; Martin Kaymer, Germany; Jimmy Walker, United States.

9:23 a.m.-4:22 a.m. – Jamie Donaldson, Wales; Yuta Ikeda, Japan; Keegan Bradley, United States.

9:34 a.m.-4:33 a.m. – Matt Kuchar, United States; Phil Mickelson, United States; Henrik Stenson, Sweden.

The winner is one of the nine players listed in the three ‘games’ above. 

9:45 a.m.-4:44 a.m. – Nick Faldo, England; Justin Rose, England; Rickie Fowler, United States.

Faldo is back with Fannie for his St. Andrews swan song, but who fucking cares?

9:56 a.m.-4:55 a.m. – Jim Furyk, United States; Paul Casey, England; Branden Grace, South Africa.

10:07 a.m.-5:06 a.m. – Harris English, United States; a-Ashley Chesters, England; Andy Sullivan, England.

10:18 a.m.-5:17 a.m. – Koumei Oda, Japan; Marc Leishman, Australia; Kiradech Aphibarnrat, Thailand.

10:29 a.m.-5:28 a.m. – Edoardo Molinari, Italy; James Morrison, England; Romain Wattel, France.

10:40 a.m.-5:39 a.m. – Pelle Edberg, Sweden; Daniel Berger, United States; Mark Young, England. 

10:51 a.m.-5:50 a.m. – Brett Rumford, Australia; Tom Gillis, United States; a-Ben Taylor, England.

11:02 a.m.-6:01 a.m. – Marcus Fraser, Australia; Scott Strange, Australia; a-Alister Balcombe, England.

11:13 a.m.-6:12 a.m. – Taichi Teshima, Japan; Robert Dinwiddie, England, Rikard Karlbert, Sweden.

Sorry We Missed You

On Monday at the Open, Laura Davies was inducted into the golf Hall of Fame. She’s very deserving of the honor, that is without question. From all accounts it was a beautiful ceremony where all the right things were said and all the right people were thanked. So what’s the problem? Laura didn’t make it and her acceptance was shown from a recording she made.

Laura spent her weekend in Pennsylvania playing in the women’s U.S. Open. She was then scheduled to hop a flight to Scotland to be at her ceremony. Flight delays didn’t allow that to happen. Why a plane wasn’t sent for her is anybody’s guess. That’s where someone fucked up. There was a rumor that Arnold Palmer sent his plane for her, but that has since been debunked. Its a shame this played out without LD making her own HoF induction, but there’s no reason to take to Twitter and claim it is some kind of major injustice the world can’t work through. Seriously, tons of golf journos, LPGA peers of Laura, and other golf so-and-sos did just that when they found out Laura was stuck in an airport during her induction. Yes, that sucks, but did you expect the ceremony to get bumped to a new day? Logistics of big events don’t work that way. The show must go on. This wasn’t some attempt to try to slight part of golf’s royal family.

Who Is Wearing What

If it is a major week then it is also a week that we must discuss scripted outfits for certain players. This is an obligation. We cannot over look it. Threads are important in that way. But seriously, here’s a bunch of shit the dudes will wear while golfing across the pond this week.

Patrick Reed

That is a clean, simple look for PR. Now he just needs to lose the choker and 15 lbs. Let’s be honest, the only reason I’m showing you this one is because of the look on Reed’s face in the shot. What the fuck is that? I’ve seen it before somewhere.

Dustin Johnson

One pair of slacks? He’s obviously going through a gray period in the wake of his fuck up at Chambers Bay.

Jason Day

Day’s look is simple and clean. I find it interesting that this image shows an Adidas hat on his head. That would be new because Day typically wears a Taylormade lid (yes, TM, Adidas, and Ashworth are owned by the same company).

Jordan Spieth

I swear he wears the same 4 outfits every week. Am I alone? Is Under Armor that dull or is Spieth trapped in the old Tiger Woods video game in which each pro only had four shirts to wear?

Rickie Fowler 

Looks good, for Puma, but I’m not into the script “Puma” on Rick’s hats.

Tiger Woods

Why does Nike always show their players head cover? They didn’t make Frank. There’s no $woosh on the little cat. I don’t get it.

Rory McIlroy

An ankle brace, gym shorts, and a bathrobe seems about right for the injured World Number 1.

Paul Casey 

Why am I showing you Paul Casey’s scripted gear? Because he’s the guy Nike appears to be using to launch all their new hyper orange shit that is coming out for the 2nd half of 2015. I like it, and I suspect they’ll use it to replace that hyper neon yellow they’ve had on everything for the first part of the year. Does that mean their clubs will get a new color too?

Enough Of This

If you’ve figured out by now that Monday at the Open was a bit of a slow day, you couldn’t be more right. When the big news of the day is Tim Clark WD’ding….well……fuck it, I almost didn’t write a post due to a lack of real news, etc. With more pressers coming and more story lines breaking we should all hold our breath for more exciting things to talk about than wardrobes come Tuesday. Until then.

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1 Response to Open Championship: Day 1

  1. says:

    It’s a shame Laura D. didn’t make the ceremony with all the riches at the R&A someone should have sent a private plane. It was reported she did make it in time for the reception so all was not lost. Delays in flights to Europe are comman place, it wouldn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out it could happen and make better arrangements.
    Frisches Big Boy! I knew Reed looked familiar! Thanks for pointing that out!
    Gray is the big color for the first of the season this year. Pretty classic, Not a huge orange fan though. I thnk I like Rickies kit the best of these.
    Should be an interesting tourney. Wouldn’t be surprised if the winner was someone under the radar.

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