Time For A Slap Fight (UPDATED)

Poulter Is Going To Throw His Purse At Hideki

I missed it if TGC got any footage of it and showed it during their broadcast of the WGC Cadillac 2nd round. According to Ian James Poulter, former Asian Amateur Champ turned pro – Hideki Matsuyama, put a good sized hole in the 13th green at Doral with his putter. The PGA Tour app says Matsuyama missed a 9 foot par putt and tapped in for bogey on the hole.

How is that reason to fuck up a green in such a way that it could have an impact on the rest of the field? I’ve broken clubs. Thrown clubs. Yelled loudly. I might have even snapped a rake in half during my more competitive days (that were typically played with a hangover). But I’ve never damaged a green to the point where it needed repair. That’s inexcusable. Here’s what Poults had to say:

The referee part is what really gets me. Matsuyama lost it. It happens, but don’t fuck with the greens. Chuck the club, break it over your knee……anything but the gouge of the green. If you do lose it that bad you better do something about it. Fix your mistake. You fucked up. Not your caddie. Not your mommy. Not a referee. Suck it up and apologize to the field, the tour, and Trump, and all will be forgotten. I’m certain an envelope with a decent size fine will be in his locker tomorrow morning. Poulter has other ideas.

Nothing like having a nagging woman snapping at you all day. You earned that one Hideki. Hopefully Poults brushes up on his Japanese with some Rosetta Stone tonight. If anyone has the footage of Matsuyama’s brain fart, please alert me. I love seeing shit like that. There’s no truth to the rumor that he yelled “hissatsu” while violently striking the turf. Imagine if he’d done that at Augusta. Billy Payne would drag his ass down Magnolia Lane to Washington Street and throw him into oncoming traffic…..rightfully so.


Turns out what Matsuyama did wasn’t all that bad. Minor damage at best. My apologizes to him. Why Poulter felt the need to be such a douche about it is strange, but not surprising because he is a drama queen. I should have known better than to post something about a Poulter Twitter rant without even seeing the footage first. Here’s the GIF of the incident from Adam Sarson:

You can’t even see damage. It is debatable if he even made contact with the green. Still, he sought out Poults on the range and made amends. Good for him, even if he didn’t really need to do so. Case closed.

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4 Responses to Time For A Slap Fight (UPDATED)

  1. R Smith says:

    We’re I your editor, would have suggested “bansai” in place of “kamikaze”.

  2. Pingback: Matsuyama Masters Muirfield: Final Thoughts On Memorial |

  3. Pingback: The Shutters: Golf’s Whiny Bitch Of The Year |

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