Tiger’s Fuck Buddy Revisited

An Oldie, But A Goodie

Last year Tiger Woods won the Farmers Insurance Open at Torrey Pines by four shots after shooting 72 on the South Course in the final round. It was his 8th professional win in La Jolla at Torrey Pines. Today in his opening round on the South Course he fired a level par round of 72. He’s currently tied for 63rd and trails Stewart Cink by 8 shots (Cink played the easier North Course). Does anyone think TW is out of this thing and won’t win?

When Woods dominated Torrey Pines last year I scribbled out the following post. It’s worth revisiting as it was quite popular and reminds us all of how Torrey Pines loves to lay on her back for Tiger.   

(The following content was originally posted on 1/27/13)

Tiger’s Fuck Buddy 

Most single males between the ages of 16 and 30 have one. It’s just a fact. You keep her around for one reason.  She’s your go to at 3 am when you get home from the bar. You never take her out, you never buy her dinner, the girl is used and abused and she truly believes one day you’ll take her home to meet your mom. That is what a fuck buddy is for, and that is how Tiger Woods treats Torrey Pines.

Torrey Pines South is Tiger’s 3 am phone call, his Perkins’ waitress before there was a Perkins’ waitress, or his slightly chubby college neighbor that doesn’t understand why he has to drink so much before he kisses her. You get the point. He can do whatever he wants around this golf course and it won’t matter because he’ll end up on top of the leader board when the tournament dust settles. Just ask Rocco.

The day started with him sticking it on the par three 3rd after making birdie on 2. He hit a spinner into 13 green to set up a tap in bird and the route was on. Vintage Eldrick Woods up to that point. Then boring golf set it. We were forced to watch him start hacking it around while the rest of the field was stuck in neutral. Sneds and Watney didn’t have enough amo and were only firing blanks. Tiger even bogeyed 18 for the first time in some 60 all time professional rounds on the South course just to give these dopes a chance.

To start the 4th round Woods hit two snap hooks like I do, yet somehow stayed level par. Hit it tight on the par 3 third and made birdie. Block right on 4 behind a tree, no problem, chicken wing it to the front and chip it in…… 2 under hitting it crooked. Two-putt birdie on 6 and finally hit a fairway on 7……you would have thought he was 3 over. Instead he’s 3 under for the round and six shots clear of the mortals when play was suspended for the day due to darkness . I think its safe to call this win number 75 for the Swooshed Cat.

Tiger Rumors

Plenty of rumors swirling about the web concerning Tiger getting back together with Elin. Boring. Plenty more rumors about him stopping in the Swiss Alps on his way to the Middle East last week to see Lindsey Vonn (his actual fuck buddy). I’m not going to get into pre-nups, 2nd marriages, or Tiger’s love life right now…..but let me ask you this…..who would you choose? Elin or Lindsey?

Lindsey above…..looks fit and athletic, but her bio says she’s 160 lbs….yikes!

Elin below…..no complaints, but I’ve heard her twin sister has the better tots.

Elin

 

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One Response to Tiger’s Fuck Buddy Revisited

  1. Steve Know says:

    Are there any pixels left to Photoshop in that Vonn pic? Good grief. I’d look like a stud if you took my head and put it on somebody else’s body. – Which is almost exactly what that Vonn pic looks like now. And who sits on a window sill like that? Oh, thanks for putting her ski boots next to her. I’m sure she takes those into the living room with her and then sits on a 3 inch sill with her legs splayed open and her shirt torn open so her panties can be ogled. I love gratuitous girl shots but who came up with this “set”? a 12 year old boy? “Just stick the boots there and open your shirt. HURRY!”.

    The tone of her face doesn’t even match the tone of her fur …………errr……. skin.

    Elin wins by a mile.

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